TITS ATTACK - SHIRT - ALL OVER

PART 9 - CHAPTER 6

I arrive in a conference room that looks like the White House crisis center. Dozens of screens lent over a large meeting table, fully equipped with speakers. I’m thoroughly searched, the inside of my rectum being the only spared part of me. Up until now I felt like I was in a sci-fi movie, but what was about to come surpassed my wildest imagination. A dude approaches the table, he’s skinny, dressed normally, wearing broken glasses fixed with sellotape, a kind of Steve Jobs from the 70’s when he still took LSD. He looks like the leader of this insurrection. For ten minutes, he depicts the crisis that society is going through with social media and the population’s general stupidity. He explains to me that the only way to put a stop to it would be a total black-out of the Internet. But the system is complex and it’s not that easy to cut off the network. So, the only solution was for the decision to come from the inside, for the system to self-destruct. For this, he had imagined a radical solution: a pornographic cyberattack. Hearing these words, I struggle to keep a straight face, trying not to imagine this little geek cuffing the carrot in front of Pornhub whilst elaborating his plan. He goes on to explain: every screen in the world will broadcast porn videos on a loop, like a storm of meteorite tits raining down on all the cities of the world. To eradicate the problem, the governments will have no choice but to shut the Internet down. Then, after a period of anarchy, the time will be right to build a new society.

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